iHate Twilight
by iSamPuckett
Summary: “I mean, I’d date you before I’d date Robert Pattinson! Hell, I’d date FREDDIE before I date him!” Carly's watching Twilight. Sam hates Twilight. What conversations can arise from this? Very minor Seddie and Cam, drabble, no flames.


**A/N: Hey all! This is just my way of saying, 'Happy Thanksgiving!' I mean what's better than a nice, fresh fanfic?? I just wanna say, if you actually LIKE Twilight (which i do not) sorry if you're offended by this, but don't flame me. I mean it. If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. Anyways, enjoy more drabble from me!**

"Hey Carls." Sam greeted nonchalantly to the brunette on the couch as she entered the Shay apartment.

"Oh, hey Sam." Carly smiled, turning away from the TV to look at her best friend. Sam gestured to the television.

"Watcha watching?" Sam asked as Carly turned back to the TV set.

"Just Twilight." she replied. Sam screwed up her face in disgust. Carly gave her a quizzical look. "What's wrong with Twilight?"

"It's just so stupid!" Sam answered, her voice indicating that is was the most obvious thing in the world. Carly's mouth fell open.

"Stupid?! Twilight isn't stupid!"

"Um, yea, Carly, it totally is. First of all, the 'vampires' sparkle." The blonde replied, putting air quotes around 'vampires.' "Last time I checked, vampires BURNED. Second of all, vampires have fangs. Those sparkle fairies don't! And third of all-"

"Well, if you hate it sooo much, then go home." Carly said crossly. Sam just rolled her eyes and plopped down next to her.

"No, I'll stay…but only cuz my mom's breaking in her new bikini, not cuz I wanna watch this trashy movie." Sam answered, then turned her attention to the actors on screen. Edward, the main 'vampire' was standing in some random woods with Bella, the whiny moral that never shuts the hell up.

"_How old are you?" Bella said, standing in front of Edward, the sunlight shining between the trees.  
"Seventeen."  
"How long have you been seventeen" She pushed.  
"A while." Edward responded._

"He's so dreamy!" Carly sighed happily. Sam snorted through her nose. Carly shot daggers at her, but Sam was unfazed.

"Please! I mean, look at him! His face looks like a foot!" Sam scoffed as Carly turned and looked at the screen in confusion. "I mean, I'd date you before I'd date him! Hell, I'd date FREDDIE before I date him!" Carly then whipped around to look at her friend.

"You'd date FREDDIE?!...Hey, wait a minute, you'd date me?!" She exclaimed. She watched as Sam's face slowly turned red as she realized what she'd just said.

"Well, y'know…just instead of that guy…" Sam muttered, looking down and twirling one of her blonde locks.

"You love Freddie." Carly said confidently, crossing her arms. Sam snapped her head up and gave Carly a deadly glare.

"If anyone else said that, they wouldn't live to see another day. And I said I'd date you, too, so I must not 'love' Fredpuss." Now it was Carly's turn to glow scarlet.

"Ummm…well, does that mean you love…me?" Carly questioned timidly. Sam just rolled her eyes again.

"Of COURSE I love you, Carls." Sam saw pure shock and panic flash in Carly's eyes before she smirked and continued. "As a friend, of course."

"Oh." Carly sighed obviously relieved, then realized what it must've sounded like. "Not that it would be bad if loved me as more than just a friend, of course! I mean, I'm not saying that you're not attractive and all! And there's nothing wrong with going that way-",

"Carls."

"Like, seriously, I have no problem with that-"

"Carlotta!"

"And even if you do like me like that-"

"CARLY!" Carly stopped her rambling for a minute and looked at Sam in confusion. "I was just kidding. I don't like you or Freddie like that, alright? But thanks for making it all awkward."

"Oh…sorry." Carly said, her face turning a deeper shade of scarlet as she sunk lower into the couch. Sam smiled and rolled her eyes yet again.

"Whatevs, Carls, let's just get back to you dumb movie." she replied as she lightly shoved her friends' shoulder. Carly smiled back.

"Alright-but no more jokes about Robert Pattinson!"

"Fine, fine…hey, who's the shirtless hobo?" Sam asked, gesturing to a shirtless Jacob on screen.

"Ugh!" Carly moan good-naturedly. This was gonna be a longgg movie.

**A/N: Alright, to explain how his face looks like a foot; me nd my class were sitting in study, and my friend was talking to three other kids about Twilight and Robert Pattinson, and i wasn't really paying attention, then i hear (quite loudly) 'Well, his face looks like a foot!" Legit, the whole class went silent and just looked at her. It was awesome. So i hoped u enjoyed this holiday treat, and if u hated it: keep it to yourself. Plz. But if u liked it, review :)**


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